Sports thoughts for the ADD mind

I don't have the time or attention span to post much of anything right now, but here's some quick thoughts on some things, ADD style...

Western Conference Finals: at least the Lakers are struggling too....

Indians come-from-behind win: !!!??? um ok? I'll take it

Eastern Conference Finals: I'm terrified. Keep me away from bridges if we lose tonight.

Other Cavs News: Hey China, SHOW ME THE MONEY!

I'd go on but..

.... OOH something shiny....

This will NEVER get old

I will be eating ramen for the next month, because I spent all my money on Cavs tickets. I have priorities you know. I debated whether or not to attend the game last night. I was pretty sure I was bad luck. But I had this gut feeling that told me I didn't want to miss this game. A part of me knew that something was going to happen, and I wanted to be able to say "I was there for that". Absolutely 110% worth it.

And the city of Cleveland let out a collective sigh

Ugh. I didn't even want to write about this. But I feel like its my duty. At the very least, this blog has been an outlet for me to lament my misery, so why stop now?

It all started out so well. There was definitely magic (with a lower case "m") in the air at the Q, and it had nothing to do with Orlando. (No, just because we lost, I will not spare you the cheese).

But the game started off weird from the beginning. About a minute into it, Dwight Howard (more ranting on him to come) decided to start breaking things. An overly aggressive slam brought down the shot clock on the backboard. To make things fair, the one on the opposite basket was shut off, and two clocks on the floor were used the remainder of the first half. DH, didn't your mother ever tell you that when you go to play at someone else's house, its not nice to break their things?

After a little show from the maintenance crew at the Q, the Cavs lit up the first quarter. The crowd was electric. At one point a friend of my brother's, who does regular reporting on the Cavs and is in the press box at nearly every game, sent him a text that said he'd never heard the place as loud as it was at the end of the first quarter. I believe it. I don't know if I've ever had that much fun at a game.

The second quarter the Magic woke up a little bit, but we still managed to play strong. I turned to my brother at one point and told him, I just want to be up by 15 at the half. Up by 12 with the clock expiring, Mo Williams launched up a truly amazing shot, sinking it from behind the half court line just as the buzzer sounded. I got my wish. The place went nuts. This is what playoff basketball is all about.

And
.....then
...........things
...................went
.........................downhill.

I really don't even want to talk about the second half. It was like watching the most fun two quarters of play imaginable, and then getting punched in the stomach repeatedly for the next two. If I had balls, I'd imagine that's what it would feel like to be kicked in them.

I don't know if it was that we got over confident, having come to expect easy wins, or what. Our defense got sloppy. Orlando's shots started falling. And we were in trouble. I understand we don't have an answer to Dwight Howard, but that's not an excuse. I officially HATE Dwight Howard. What kind of name is Dwight Howard anyway? He's like odd combination of a dorky Office character and a duck. We need to be able to stop that. Also, LeBron had 49 points. I'm so sick of hearing people say that LeBron carries this team, because we have a lot of other talent. But last night he did. Hey everyone not named LeBron, do you hear that, STEP UP! I thought we've moved past this and learned to play as a team. Take a look in the stands. Those free t-shirts everyone is wearing, and towels we're waving all say "One Goal". Let's act that way, K?

In a discussion with a friend this morning about the game, he said we need to defend the 3. And I agree. What it ended up coming down to is they made theirs, and we missed ours. When it counted most. Launching up a 3 pointer with seconds left and down by 1 infuriated me. We hadn't been hitting them all night. I don't care how wide open you are, if you are not 110% sure that ball is going in, don't take it. Drive the lane, draw the foul, take your shots. Make them both we win. Worst case scenario, tie it up, go into OT. Dwight Howard had already fouled out. (I refuse to see missing them both as a possible outcome). But alas...

So my takeaways from last night. It sucked. A lot. But maybe it was the wake-up call that we needed. We knew we weren't going to be able to coast through this round like we did the last two. No team has ever swept all the way to the finals. We had to lose a game at some point. The NBA was not going to lose out on all that extra revenue because we wanted another 4 game series and week off between games. Yes, it sucked that it had to happen in our house. But maybe now we'll realize that this isn't Detroit or Atlanta. I see us taking this series in 6 games. Before last night I thought we could do it in 5, but I think Orlando's got one more game in them.

As we pulled into to the driveway last night, already heartbroken, i-pod shuffle decided to put its two cents in on the matter. (Hey i-pod shuffle, screw you!) The Rolling Stones, "You Can't Always Get What You Want" began to play, and all my brother and I could do was shake our heads and sigh. But you know what? When life gives you lemons... you make LeBron-ade. Ok yea, that only half makes sense, but whatever. GO CAVS.

Yea, It's Kind of Like That...

Some random thoughts since I haven't posted in awhile.

So the Indians and the Browns make me want to bash my head against a brick wall. Actually, watch this:



Unlike Happy Gilmore, I love Bob Barker. Bob, I feel your pain buddy. This is kind of exactly how I feel about 2/3 Cleveland teams right now. The Indians seemed to take this woman's approach recently. We've got all the numbers there in front of us, so why not just mix them up in ways that don't make any sense? Seriously, reading this recap from a recent game, I felt like I was reading the plot line for Major League 4:

Sunday in Tampa Bay, the Indians' third baseman was playing first base, their shortstop was playing third base, their second baseman was playing shortstop, and their first baseman was playing left field.

And none of it was because of injuries.

Naturally, at a key point in the game, the opposing team's pitcher — don't ask — hit an RBI double over the head of the Indians' left fielder, who is actually their first baseman and was a catcher before that.

And I've had to create a new emotion to describe how I feel about the Browns. It's an odd combination of sad, angry and indifferent. We'll call it brown. Every time I read something about this team, it's how I feel. I feel brown. Every emotion has some type of sound associated with it. Happiness? Laughter. Sadness? Crying. Brown? this sound followed by a sigh. The latest debacle involves Josh Cribbs. And seriously, I just feel brown.

At least we've got the Cavs. Game one of the Eastern conference finals tonight. I'm in Cleveland all this week and I'll be at the Q tonight. I'm giddy with excitement. I love the atmosphere of playoff basketball. I've gone to at least one playoff game each of the past three years, and there's nothing quite like it. Like most people, I was hoping we'd be playing the Celtics. For revenge. The fact that I feel like it would have made for an easier series. The Magic have been giving us trouble all year. But again, we're on fire right now. We're coming off of an extended rest again. I saw an interview with LeBron last night where he was asked, Do you feel like you are the only one who can stop you right now? LeBron's response? I don't want to say that exactly. Well.... Actually... I do.

I. LOVE. IT. (Whether the you was a collective you meaning the Cavs, or LeBron himself is irrelevant)

So yea, there you have it.

The (new) Shot: Rewriting Cleveland's History

Clevelanders, I'm sorry. I know this is one of those unspoken things in our history. But I had to bring it up. My cousin lamented about it in her facebook status today, so if its on my mind, you must commiserate with me.

Today marks the 20th anniversary of The Shot. If that doesn't immediately depress you, you're obviously one of my non-Cleveland friends that read my blog for my awesome photoshop skills (don't worry, we're getting to those). Warning to all Clevelanders, that link will make you cry. Don't read it!

But don't worry, this sad tale is not without a pick me up. With another edition of the LeBron show tonight, I'm hoping him and his supporting cast can rewrite history. So Cleveland fans behold:

This :
(sorry had to include for comparison purposes)

Becomes -->

(this guy is Atlanta Hawks rookie Thomas Gardner, he was #3, so it worked)

Becomes -->
(a preview of what's to come?)

GO CAVS!

Draft Day 2K9

Even though it took us 30 years.... we've made our first pick. Nothing like an opportunity for some bad photoshopping.



Onto the 2nd round, where we have pretty much every freaking pick.

Public Service Announcement

So I thought it would go away. But it hasn't. And I feel like the problem is getting worse. This problem is infiltrating all aspects of our society. It's already found its way into one of my favorite hobbies (drinking) and I'm terrified that it is only a matter of time before it infiltrates something else I hold near and dear, the world of sports.

So I'm calling upon you fellow sports fans to help me. This problem is pure evil. The mere thought of it invokes nightmares. It spans generations. Young and old alike.

If you haven't figured out what I'm talking about yet, it's the Snuggie. At first, I thought it was a cruel joke. Then I slowly started to realize that people were serious about this thing. A freaking blanket with sleeves?? You've got to be kidding me. Then I thought, well at least its appeal is limited to crazy people. But you know what? People that I (once) viewed as sane, logical individuals started telling me they wanted one or thought they were a great idea. UM NO! In the god awful commercial (one that almost parodies itself) for these things, it shows people at a sporting event wearing them. "Great for outdoors!" You know what else is great for outdoors? A COAT! And guess what… it also has sleeves! And you don't look like you're in some weird Scientology sect.

With spring baseball weather always questionable, and football season just around the corner (fall will be here sooner than you think), I'm terrified these atrocities are going to start showing up in the stands. So my call to you, loyal readers, is this:

The first time you spot one of these when you're in the stands cheering on your favorite team, and you know it's going to happen sooner or later, put a stop to it. I don't care if it’s a man twice your size, a woman, or a child. You must remedy the situation. Punch them in the face. Throw your beer on them. Squirt stadium mustard in the shape of a "z", Zorro style, all over it. (or maybe an "s", for snuggie). Whatever you do, make sure this person knows what a douche bag they are. Teach them a lesson. If not, this may be our future:

As if the Yankees fans aren't bad enough.

And if you're beside yourself with excitement because of the fact I posted twice today- its because this is also HERE at Straight up Sports, where 7 out of 8* bloggers agree, the Snuggie tarnishes even A.Rod's stellar public image.

*this statistic is totally made up